...and I don't want anyone to see me. Which actually means I'm moving forward with my grief. Hold tight; I'll try to explain what I mean.
I don't mind being back to work after a two week break. I enjoy talking with my students as they tell me their stories from the holiday break. Yesterday, I actually laughed out loud for several minutes. Loudly. And it felt wonderful.
I rarely blur the lines between home and work. Rarely.
However, I didn't have much of a choice about the lines blurring when Dad died because
1. my mom used to work at the high school where I currently work so everyone asks how she is doing
2. my dad announced football games where I currently work so the community asks how we are doing
3. I went to high school where I currently work so everyone asks how I am doing and
4. I have really good friends where I currently work who ask how I'm doing.
I really love long sentences.
I know I'm coming out of the grief fog because I'm noticing, when people ask, I hate it. This was very "before Dad died" behavior for me. What looks like concern to others feels like pity to me. I'm not saying I don't appreciate the support. I'm just over needing it.
It's weird. I know. Just go with it.